A modern nativity

And it came to pass in those days, that some women cleaved one unto another, and many men also likewise. And wished to be married, yea, to bring forth children, each according to their own natures.

And therefore, Joseph went out of Australia, out of the city of Melbourne, into India, unto the city of Bombay (which is called Mumbai) because he desired greatly to be a father.

With him also went Marius, his espoused husband – whose mother longed for grandchildren – to meet their surrogate, who was great with child.

And so it was, that while they were there, the days were accomplished that the surrogate should deliver.

And she brought forth their firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in their arms. She then departed, for her task was done.

But there were – in that same land of Australia – politicians abiding in the fields, keeping watch over their flocks.
And, lo, the fear of the voters came upon them, and they were sore afraid.

They said unto one another, “let us shun this child, and make him Illegal, lest the Cardinal smite us from the pulpit, and the unionist with his bloc vote also.”

“For unto us is born this day, in the city of Mumbai, a boy with two fathers from Australia, which will make them very cross, and raise up a multitude against us.”

Then suddenly there came an angelic host, a multitude of heavenly lesbians, praising the surrogate and giving forth praise and honor to donors also.

They said, for inasmuch as they have done this for our gay brothers, they have done this for us, therefore rejoice, rejoice!

Glory to the Surrogate in the highest, on earth peace, and show some bloody good will towards gay dads and lesbian mums, you mongrels, or else.

And it came to pass, as the lesbians were gone away from them into Northcote, the politicians said one to another, “let us now go, even unto Melbourne, and see this thing which is come to pass, which the angelic host hath made known unto us.”

And they came with haste, and found Marius and Joseph and the babe lying in a beautifully refurbished wicker cradle, with an antique lace canopy.

And when they had seen it, they made known abroad the sayings which were told them by the lesbians.

And all they that heard it, wondered at those things which were told them. And went to have a look for themselves, and were amazed, for the babe was loved and cared for beyond all measure, and they saw that this was good.

Here endeth the lesson.

By Doug Pollard