Slur-Slinging MAGA Candidate Making Texas Congress Run

After achieving infamy with a video where said homophobic slurs with her full chest and a ’warning’ to voters not to “be weak and gay”, 25-year old MAGA candidate Valentia Gomez has revealed she’s running for US Congress despite some crushing defeats in proper elections. 

Despite a number of controversial videos where she openly called members of the LGBTQIA+ community slurs and pedophiles, Gomez has managed to secure a substantial online following despite some hypocrisies from her like dancing at an Aquaria drag show on New Year’s Eve. 

Nonetheless, Gomez is pushing on. In a typically explosive video, she tells Texas to “buckle up” while she announces: “I’m running for Congress in Texas and I’m taking down a rhino and a dinosaur once and for all, because Congress is full of crooks like Speaker [Mike] Johnson who is just a little man with no balls that funds Ukraine, and betrays the American people every chance he gets, and Dan Crenshaw, who is only good at betraying his Navy Seals.”

After citing her credentials (which curiously did not include her 6th place finish in the Missouri Republican primary), she said that people should vote for her because “I don’t give a fuck what all those bureaucrats in Washington DC think about me. I’m coming to Texas to speak the truth, cook the crooks and save the children.”

In another bit of irony that Gomez didn’t seem to grasp, the song played in the background of her promo video is the choir version of Madonna’s Like A Prayer from Deadpool & Wolverine – surely not the greatest choice when your platform is built on anti-queer rhetoric…

I’m running for Congress in Texas.
I don’t fear pdfs, criminals, or the crooks in DC. I only fear God. pic.twitter.com/sWiZBOdTmf

— Valentina Gomez (@ValentinaForUSA) December 18, 2024

As with many of her other videos, a number of progressive voices were quick to mock her. “Didn’t you already get your ass kicked running for office in Missouri?” inquired one Twitter/X user, while another called her “the funniest grifter in the history of Earth.” Many also accused Gomez of ‘carpetbagging’, a term used for those seeking election in an area where they don’t have any connections. 

However, one user did manage to get one silver lining out of the announcement: “SHE’S TEXAS’ PROBLEM NOW!”

Be sure to expect more ‘delightful’ videos from Ms Gomez during her electoral campaign…